Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize