I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
