Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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