mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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