At least make sure they are 18
Why
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
