so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
