go do what you do best...puke behind churches
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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