She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Even my vagina gasped.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
