I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
