I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
