He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
