just come out here and I will go home with you...
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize