don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
