She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
