Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize