that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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