i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
