3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
