the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
