Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
