so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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