She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
