Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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