my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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