he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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