have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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