worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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