Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
