You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
