Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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