We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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