You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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