my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
