Pappa wants mamma naked
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
