I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
