The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
