ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
