what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
