??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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