The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
