I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Randomize
