she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Couch. On fire.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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