Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
we're making bets on your personal life
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
