Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize
