i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
