i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
