There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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