So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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