look no pants
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
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