I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
