I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I am one with the molecules
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